Seven Days Till Wake Up
by HannahCake310
Summary: "This war is wrong, Leonardo. We shouldn't be over there. You should be here, at home, bro." Mikey said after a few minutes of silence. Leonardo had to look away from the face on the screen so his baby brother couldn't see his anger, his disappointment."You… you just don't understand, Mike… I'm here so you don't have to be." Was all Leo said. Human!Au
1. Chapter 1

**I've been wanting to post this for a while but I've been so busy! And I've been scared about posting a human!war!AU but here it is!**

**This is a war Au so be warned! There is some bad language and there is violence. I don't claim to know everything about the Army so some stuff may be wrong but, you know, just go with it, Okay? **

**Seven days until wake up is an Army term meaning seven days until the end of a deployment. One could also say something like One month until wake up (one month until the end of a deployment) and so on. **

**I own nothing!**

* * *

**Seven Days Till Wake Up**

_"They were soldiers, and sometimes that meant having to do things that sane people never would."_

"If only Donnie and Mikey could see me now," Leonardo mumbled to himself as he ran his dirt crusted fingers through his brown hair. Sweat dripped down the side of his face from his helmet. The helmet was too big for him, it slid down over his eyes obstructing his vision and generally annoying the shit out of him on a daily basis. The oversized pack on his back with four long, heavy antennas sticking out of it tore into his shoulders and pulled at his aching body.

Seven months he had been in Central America fighting with a squad from the 31st Light Infantry Division. Seven months of getting eaten alive by bugs and harassed by snakes and terrorized by rats the size of small dogs. Seven months and only a few letters from his brothers who were back home in New York, safe and sound and probably out protesting the war that Leonardo was fighting.

_They're probably marching in the streets with their other war-hating friends preaching for peace_, Leonardo thought bitterly. His younger brothers didn't understand what was going on. They didn't understand why their older brother went to war. For the first month after Leonardo had been shipped over to Central America Donatello hadn't even written to him, he was too angry. When Leonardo did get the chance to Skype home Don hadn't even wanted to speak with him.

"He's just angry, Leo. He'll get over it soon," Michelangelo had promised.

"Why's he so mad, Mike?" Leo had asked as he tucked himself away in the corner of the tent that his squad of ten men shared. There had been no one in the tent at the time but all the same, Leonardo wanted even a small bit of privacy.

Mikey had shrugged a little, the iPad he was holding wobbled. "I don't know, man. I mean… you didn't really even tell us you were leaving."

Leonardo scoffed, "Yes, I did!"

Mike shook his head slowly. Even though they were thousands of miles away Leonardo felt like he could reach out and run his fingers through his youngest brother's smooth blonde hair.

"You know how we feel about this war, dude. It's stupid and you don't gotta be there in the first place. Why're there? Why did you hav'ta go even when we told you that you shouldn't?" Tears pooled in Mikey's eyes, he looked away from the camera. Leo lost his breath and had to bite his tongue to stop the wave of emotion that flowed through him.

Why did he join? Leonardo had asked himself that same question hundreds of times. He was eighteen, had his whole life in front of him, had a girl who loved him and a family that had hated war ever since their father had been wounded in Vietnam… So why did he join? Maybe it was all of the recruitment posters that lined the streets of New York with their pictures of strong men and weak enemies. Maybe it was their catchy slogans of _Join the Army, become a man, defend your country! Protect your family, join the fight! America will always fight to defend the weak!_

Maybe it was because he'd graduated High School with no plans and no real want to go to college. He wasn't like Mikey who could barely show up for class yet always manage to get acceptable grades and he wasn't like Don who was already in college level classes and sweeping through them. He had to work hard, put long hours into his books and pay attention to everything and he just didn't want that anymore. He liked shooting guns at the gun range and he liked fighting and learning karate at the dojo his father owned, he just liked different things than his brothers and they couldn't understand that.

"This war is _wrong_, Leonardo. We shouldn't be over there. _You_ should be here, bro," Mikey had said after a few minutes of silence. Leonardo had to look away from the face on the screen so his baby brother could see his anger, his disappointment.

_Yes, we need to be here. _

Central America was the new 'zone'; it was the new threat on the United States. Drug Lords and Cartels and weapons depots and caches of billions handed under the table to local militias was the new Act of Terrorism. Local Militias plagued the jungles of Central America terrorizing the people who inhabited the villages and small cities. Small villages that were otherwise innocent would be the sights of brutal and bloody massacres from the militias. It got so out of hand that now, two years after the first reported attack on a village, fifteen thousand people – men, woman and _children_ – were dead. The United States of America, thinking themselves a higher God that needed to swoop down to save all the poor countries in the world had decided to take it upon themselves to save the people in Central America.

That was why Leo had been deployed to these harsh jungles. To help stop those massacres. Mikey just wouldn't understand, he hadn't seen that things Leonaro had seen. Mike hadn't seen the children who were just skin and bones and sunken eyes and who begged for food that the soldiers just couldn't spare to give. Mikey hadn't had to call in airstrikes or pull the trigger while aiming his gun at another human being. Mikey never had to scrapple on the ground with another man in hand-to-hand combat as the enemy soldier held a knife to his throat – that one had been a close one and the thin scar that ran across Leonardo's neck was a permanent reminder of what had happened.

"You… you just wouldn't understand, Mike… I'm here so you don't have to be." Was all Leo said. They had both been silent for a minutes before the opening of the tent Leonardo was in was pushed aside and Salls and Hollywood – men in Leo's squad – came walking in holding a loud conversation with their guns laid across their backs ready to grab and fire at a moment's notice.

"I-I gotta go, Mike," he'd said quickly. Mikey opened his mouth to protest but Leo had cut him off, "Tell Dad that I said I'm doing okay and don't overfeed Klunk, that poor cat is getting fat from the pictures I've seen. Also, tell April that I said hey and that I'll give her a call here pretty soon. And… and tell Don that I said that I love him and I'll write to him the next chance I get even if he doesn't look at my letters'. Bye, Mike, I love you." Leonardo closed his laptop before Mikey had the chance to say anything back.

"Hey Hamato," Colonel Cotter, Leonardo's Commanding Officer whispered as he knelt down next to him in the dirt pulling the teenager from his thoughts. They had their backs to a large tree whose bark had been peeled away from a Napalm airstrike a month ago. The four other guys in the small scouting party were all hunched behind their own trees. Their camouflaged uniforms melting into the trees and foliage so perfectly only the whites of their eyes stood out. Leonardo licked his lips with a dry tongue and pulled the book that held the Codes from his back pocket. "Call in an airstrike near four-three-Alpha-ten. Then when you're done tell the chopper to give us ten mikes so we can get the hell outta here before the bombs drop."

"Yes, sir." Leonardo answered already dialing in the orders and translating them into their Code. After relaying the information to Command and getting the; "Order understood, proceed to your rally point. You have fifteen mikes until Napalm drop. Command out." Leonardo turned back to his CO and nodded.

"Move out men," ordered Cotter.

* * *

A large, heavy hand came down across Leonardo's shoulder starling him as he walked back to the Communications tent to put away his gear. Leo whipped around to see Raphael smirking at him with a crooked grin. Leo swatted his hand away.

"Jesus, you scared me," he laughed.

"I ain't Jesus, Blue," chuckled Raph as he used the nickname the men in their squad had given Leo. He huffed a sigh. _Dad sends me _one_ pack of bright blue socks and it's like no one will ever forgive me for not sharing them._

"Call me Blue one more time and I'll call you Raphie for the rest of your life," Leonardo warned. Raph put his hands up in surrender as they fell into step with one another.

"Fine, fine, fine no more Blue. So, I heard the mission this afternoon went off without a hitch."

"Yep, it was fine you know, SSDD."

"Yeah," Raph gave out a hearty laugh as they rounded the corner to head into the Communications tent. "Same shit, different day."

Leo smiled and looked over at his friend. Even though they were in different squads Raphael was still one of the best friends Leo had ever had. Standing at a lanky six-foot-tall frame with bulky shoulders and fiery red hair, Raph stood out like a sore thumb. His hair was so red and grew so fast that Cotter made him lather it up with mud before every jungle mission because he claimed, "Your hair is a Goddamn beacon announcing our presence to the enemy!"

Raph entered the tent first then pulled it aside to let Leo and his massive backpack through. With a few grunts, some curses and a heave or two Leo unbuckled his pack and threw it on one of the two tables in the tent that weren't cluttered with important papers.

"Did Stockman go out with you guys today?" questioned Raph looking at a stack of papers that Leo was sure he wasn't supposed to be looking at. Leo plucked them from his hands. "Of course he was."

Raph shook his head and took his helmet off placing it on the table, crumpling some papers. "That fucker has been riding my ass for a week. I'm just glad he finally got off his ass and went on a mission instead of tryin' to command by proxy like he's doing since he got off the plane."

Leo rolled his shoulders trying to get all the kinks and knots out. His neck popped. "You gonna go to the mess and get some chow soon?"

"Na, I got a care package from home that's a shit ton better than the shit the Canteen is cookin'." Raph sat down in Leo's chair and took out his bowie-knife to hack away at the piece of wood that was always in the back pocket of his cargo pants. Little pieces of wood scattered over the table of papers with codes that Leonardo had yet to decipher for his squad. "You hear from yer brothers this week?"

Leo shook his head then turned away from Raph so the other teenager couldn't see the hurt on his face. "April sent me a package a few days ago and my dad emailed me but nothing from Mike or Don."

"It's okay man," Raph said sincerely. "They'll come around and besides it's only a week till wake up, you'll see them soon."

Looking up at the top of the tent Leo sighed and smiled slightly. _Yeah, seven days until this deployments over and I can finally go home._

"What is the first thing you're gonna do when you get home, Raphie?" asked Leo shuffling old papers with codes that didn't exists anymore out of the way so he could take out the new papers and organize them. Raph leaned back in his chair with a small smile grazing his grizzled face.

"Kiss the ground then kiss my girl," he answered dreamily. "Then I'm gonna go to PJ's Burgers on the corner of 5th and High Street and order two of the biggest, fattest, juiciest burgers on the menu."

Leo's mouth watered at the thought. "Why two?"

Raph tilted his head to the side to give Leo a dumbfounded look, "One for me and one for you, dumbass."

"Sounds good," was all Leo said as he continued to work.

"And hey, I was thinkin', when we land back in the states I could introduce you to my brother, Casey, and I could meet your girl, April, then we could all go out for a drink." Leo nodded, that sounded like the best idea Raphs' ever had. Even if neither of them were old enough to drink, if they sauntered into the bar like they owned it with their dog tags hanging out of their shirts and deep tans on their skin from the Central American sun glowing in the dim lights of the bar no one would question them if they orders a beer and a few fingers of whisky.

"Deal," said Leo.

"Great, I think it's about time for my – "

A face popped into the Communications tent cutting Raph off. It was Mooch – Private Nathan DeSaw – and he was scowling at Raph. "Hothead, it's time for our watch duty. _Actually_, it was time to watch the Line about five mikes ago," he glared at Raph before turning to Leo. "Hey Blue, what's up?"

"Nothing much," Leo answered.

Raph hoisted himself up from Leo's chair then stuffed the chunk of wood into his back pocket and sheathed his knife. "Later Leo," he threw over his shoulder as he left the tent.

"Be safe," Leo called back to them as the flap of the tent swished shut.

The rest of the afternoon went by quickly and without much incident. There were no casualties from bullets or snakes or tarantulas or giant man-eating rats. All the men in the 31st Light Infantry Division were unnaturally cheery in the hot, dense jungle. They were about to go home. Seven days – one _week_ – they could go home. All the fathers could return to beautiful children, husbands back to doting wives, sons back to their worrying mothers and fretting fathers. One week and they could all go home and try to forget about the horrors of war. They would talk away their troubles or drown them with alcohol. Either way they would be leaving this jungle soon.

Leo was peering over a large map of the surrounding area. Small black marks dotted the map in places where the Charlies – the enemies – were thought to be hiding while larger gold bars marked the places where American Forces were stationed. The eighteen-year-old was too busy decoding the most recent message then adding corrections to the large map to notice the first shot that rang through the musky air. Gun shots were common, an everyday occurrence. It was the second burst of machine gun fire that caught his attention making him look up from his map slowly. A scream sounded through the unit's camp so loud Leo flinched.

"Ambush!"

The scream was silenced almost before it was heard. More gun fire answered the enemy fire, Leo could tell, from their side. The sound of running boots past the tent he was in made him stand up with a start from the map. He quickly removed his thick rimmed reading glasses after hearing the screams of men a ways from the closed flapped tent. More sounds of boots hitting mud sounded in Leo's ears. Someone was running towards his Communications tent.

"Third Squad follow me!" Someone yelled, it sounded like Sergeant Stockman.

Leo grabbed for the automatic that was always near his side. The gun was big and whole in his hands. If he were to be attacked he wouldn't go down without a fight. He would not die here. Leonardo felt his heart thump faster. His muscles tightened in anticipation and fear fueled his need to protect himself, to _not_ die. Suddenly, the flap of his tent jerked open. Leo aimed his gun, ready to blow whoever it was away.

The dirty, sweaty face of Raphael peered into the tent. He was breathless; a slim line of blood ran from his temple. His too-red hair stuck out from under his helmet and was plastered to his forehead by sweat. Dirt and mud and blood caked the greater part of his face. His chest was heaving, his eyes looked wild. This was a whole new Raphael than Leonardo had ever seen.

Leo let out a quick breath before loosening his finger slightly from the trigger. He looked down at Raph's gun. It was practically smoking in his hands. The magazines that usually crisscrossed his chest were gone, probably already having been used.

"Everything is FUBAR up man, we gotta go, we gotta go now!" Raph rushed into the tent, Leo stayed frozen as another bout of gunfire peppered overhead.

Then he heard it, it was just like deep whistle that got closer and closer as the second ticked by. The whistle of the rocket was silenced for less than a split second before the ground beneath Leo's boots shook and the cries of men assaulted his ears. Stacks of papers slipped off of the makeshift table and tumbled into a mess on the ground. There was more popping of gun fire, cries of men trying to organize the chaos, someone in the distance was pleading for a medic.

Raph was still breathing hard, he gripped his rifle with white knuckled hands, "It's a cluster-fuck out there Leo, our whole company's up Shit Creek without a paddle. We gotta go man, we gotta _go_!" By the time the last words left his mouth Raph had grabbed a hold of Leo with shaky, gunpowder blackened hands and was hauling him towards the flap of the tent.

Another whistle, the ground shook harder, Raph stumbled.

"Wait!" Leo had to yell over the sounds of war behind waged outside the tent. "The codes! I can't leave without them!"

"We don't have time! There comin'!" Raph growled forcing Leo to move. His eyes were on fire.

Leo dug his feet into the ground forcing them to a halt. "We are the United States Army for Christ's sake! There's no way the local militia could break our perimeters. We-"

"We've only got a _unit_ worth of men! A few squads, that it dumbass! Everyone else is with Colonel Trapper for their mission Command sent of last week," Raph dug his nails into Leo's arms. "They brought their whole damn _army_!"

"Colonel Cotter would never-"

"Colonel Cotter is dead, man. They breached the perimeter."

_That's not possible,_ Leo thought, a knot forming in his throat. Their perimeter was always secure. It was half a klick out of the Commanders base, were Leo and Raph stood now.

Raph's hand tightened again. "The Charlies killed Mooch in front of me. Jameson tried to call for back up but he bit it too and the transmission got cut. Holloway, Fox and Salls went to go check it out..." Raph paused, his voice sounded hollow. The pepper of gunfire sounded closer. "Their all dead. We gotta go!" Raph pulled him aggressively. He was finished talking, it was time to go.

Leo dug his feet into the ground further stopping his friend from pulling him out of the tent.

"I can't go without the codes!" he yelled in Raph's face over the bullets shooting outside. He knew that those codes in the hands of an enemy could spell disaster. Those codes could be used to uncover secrets that were supposed to _stay_ secret save for the few cleared individuals, like Leo, who were allowed to know them. "I gotta take them with me!"

Raph's eyes were big and wild as he looked around the two tables that held maps and schematics, codes and partially decoded messages. He bit his lip hard enough to draw blood, "Do you have them memorized?"

Leo stopped his frantic flinging of papers into his camouflaged army pack. He nodded once before grabbing the next set of papers and stuffing them into the bag.

"Burn them, all of them. We don't have time, we gotta go _now_!"

Leo looked up just in time to see a small lighter being flung at his head. He used his reflexes to catch it but held it in his hands for a moment. If he burned these papers and he didn't have them memorized right... Oh hell, he'd be in so much trouble. "I can't. I-"

He was cut off as a spray of bullets tore through the top of the tent. Leo hit the ground hard a second after Raph did. His cheek stung and when he pulled his hand from his face crimson blood pained his fingers.

Oh shit.

"Leo!" screamed Raph already moving out of the tent. Leo didn't even think twice, he couldn't think, everything was happening so fast. He grabbed the papers from his bag then lit the ends and edges like he's seen villains on TV do to evidence when they were tormenting the hero. The first paper went up like dry leaves. The second was soon to follow then the third went until all the papers were at some point of burning.

"Come on!" Raph was practically begging, his helmet askew on his sweaty head. Leo chanced one more second to grab his gun before he was out the tent.

Fire, almost like the fire that was burning through the Communications tent spread in front of him. Men were running from the woods towards him - American men with flags on their shoulders and camouflage shifting with their bodies. It was loud and disorientating. Behind him he felt the heat of fire licking up from the burning tent but in front of him he could feel the same fire a thousand fold as it raged across the jungle.

"Retreat! Why'r you just standing there Blue? Run you son of a-"

The man running toward him – Sergeant Stockman – was cut off as the ground exploded next to him and he was thrown sideways. Leo looked on in horror as he saw the blood start to pool around the side of Stockman's caved-in head.

More screaming. More bouts of gunfire. They were being overrun.

Someone, something, grabbed his hand that wasn't holding his unused gun bringing Leonardo back into reality.

"We gotta go, man! _We gotta go!_" screamed the voice in his ear. Raph forced him along by the sleeve of his jacket. Quickly, Leo turned around to run.

Without thinking and just letting his feet take control he ran after his friend. They entered into the jungle that wasn't cleared, where the vines still licked at their feet, tree roots made them stumble before they even knew they were falling and plants blocked their view for more than three feet in front of their faces.

Walking through the jungle was hard without a machete. Running, borderline impossible. In training at basic it had been beaten into Leo's head to always pick up his feet while in enemy jungles. IED's, hidden explosives that the locals annoying planted into the ground was only one thing that could go wrong by taking a bad step. One fowl step and you'd be sky-high even before you knew what was happening.

His legs were burning, Leo thought they were about to fall off. He forced his legs to go faster to match Raph's who was taller, a bigger stride. They needed to put as much distance between those Charlie's that were murdering they're unit as they could. In front of him, Raph disappeared into the vegetation a few seconds before Leo broke through and ran head first into his back.

"Raph, what the - "

"Shhh!" Raph clamped his hand over Leo's mouth, his eyes were blown wide. Leo looked over into the clearing that a small village had molded itself into. There, standing in the middle of the village were Charlie's with guns in their hands and what looked like half the village herded into a pile. They were talking in Spanish, their gruff voices echoed to Leo's ears.

Raph and Leo hesitated, what was there to do? They couldn't turn around - the militia was right on their heels. They couldn't go forward. They were stuck.

"Soldier... Soldier!" A voice hissed from the side. At once both boys looked over to the mouth of the jungle. Leo saw nothing, only more green jungle and canopy leaves, so he turned back to the villagers that hadn't yet realized they were there. The Charlie's in charge were still yelling at the people, brandishing their weapons threateningly.

"Soldier!" The voice said louder.

"Dude," Raph said patting Leo's shoulder looking over to where he heard the voice, "I think there's someone over there," he finished on a whisper.

A girl, no older than fifteen came out of the jungle just far enough to be seen. Her tan skin and brown hair looked clean but her clothes were dirty. A stark contrast. She made a gesture to follow her then started to walk away, back into the jungle.

Leo looked over to Raph who shrugged, "Stuck between a rock and a hard place already. What the hell." And he turned to follow her. Leo wiped the sweat from his brow then trotted to catch up to them. They entered back into the jungle but kept to the shallow side. They were following the girl as she skirted the village, giving the place a wide berth.

"Think we can trust her?" mumbled Leo into Raph's ear.

"Best chance we got. I saw at least fifty Charlies back at camp."

"Are…" Leo licked his lips losing his voice for a moment. "Do you think… Doc and Ryan and Salls. Do you think, I mean - "

"Their dead, Leo." Raph didn't turn back to look at him, he kept his eyes on the girl. "They're all dead. We weren't ready. Everyone starting slakin' 'cause we're supposed to be goin' home in a week."

"Soldiers, please," whispered the girl turning to them and putting her finger to her lip trying to silence them. They were almost clear of the village.

Leo bit his lip hard then murmured, "This wasn't supposed to happen. What about Colonel Cotter's new baby and Duke's wife? We gotta go back, man. I know I saw Stockmen get hit but he might still be alive. We gotta go see, Raphie."

"No, Blue," Raph said darkly. "It's… It's no use, their gone."

Leo stopped in his tracks, "What happened to never leave a man behind?"

Raph stopped and turned sharply on his heals ready to grab Leo again. "What happened to you not being a stupid idiot? Everything is FUBAR man, its shot to hell. Now _move_."

A lump formed in Leo's throat… dead. His entire squad, dead.

"Get it together Leonardo! This is war, shit happens," Raph hissed before turning around and taking another step. Leo begrudgingly took another step after him.

Something hard came down across Leo's face. He couldn't stop the scream that ripped from his mouth as the heavy object came down again on his forehead and everything went black. The ground beneath his feet started moving, was someone dragging him? His face felt wet. Was he crying? No. He was a soldier, soldiers don't cry. It had to be something else.

Blood? Was it blood that dripped down his face? He didn't know.

"Let him go, jackass!" shrieked a voice from behind him that sounded like Raph. The ground came up to meet Leo's face so fast he couldn't even put his arms out to stop his fall. He slammed against the dirt with so much force that he moaned involuntarily. His vision blurred. Voices, rough Spanish voices and lighter feminine voices cut through the haze that had settled through his head. Someone screamed. It was high and shrill, the brave girl that had tried to save them maybe?

Again the ground moved, no _he_ was moving. Someone had grabbed him and was now hauling him away. They threw him up against something hard – a wall maybe? – that he slid down. His chest was heaving trying to catch his breath. His head hurt, it made his eyes water as his head pounded in tune to his heart. He felt his arms being pulled up and looked up at the person touching him. The man was sweating and dirty. His face was marred with stubble on his chin. He was tan and wore a deep green uniform. He was a Charlie. The enemy.

"You are codes officer, yes?" The man's accented voice asked loudly grabbing at the rank markers on Leo's shoulders. The noises around Leo seemed to stop. Raph quit yelling, the girl who tried to save them quit screaming. It was quiet. Leo said nothing. The man pulled his gun up to Leo's head. A cold ring pressed hard against his pounding forehead.

"Get away from him!" Raph screamed again.

Leo overcame the fogginess in his brain as he heard the urgency in Raph's voice, the fear. Leo could feel himself shaking. The barrel of a gun was pressed against his head. He was surrounded by hostiles. He was going to die. At eighteen he was going to die.

_Mikey... Donnie, I'm so sorry_, he whispered in his head.

"You are code keeper," repeated the man above him.

"Get away from him!" yelled Raph again. Leo looked over and drew in a breath. Raph was on his knees not twenty feet in front of him, another man held a gun to the back of his head.

Leo grabbed his voice from deep in his chest and tried to sound in control. "Raphael, shut up," he attempted to sound calm

"Quiet!" hissed the Spanish man jabbing him in the head with the gun. "You know codes? Answer or friend dies." The soldier who stood behind Raph pressed the barrel of his gun into his head.

"Leo, don't say –"

"Quiet!" The man behind Raph ordered.

Leo stuttered, he didn't know what to do. He couldn't think, his head hurt too bad. "Y-yes. I am," he said finally. The Charlie above him nodded, a smile curled around his yellowing teeth.

"Good, we want you," In quick Spanish he called to the men holding the gun to Raph's head, "Kill him," he ordered.

Leo lurched forward, screaming, "NO!" The look on Raph's face was one of pure terror. "STOP!"

The sound of a body hitting the ground reached Leo's ears before his brain registered the body - his body, _Raph's_ body - crumpling against the dirt. Leo couldn't even remember if he'd heard a gunshot or not.

Leo wanted to scream, his heart stopped. His throat burned. His body wouldn't move. He wanted to run, to hide, to fight. He wanted his gun so he could shoot the man that shot... The man that _killed_ his best friend.

He wouldn't, _couldn't_ move. His body was numb, he was shaking. His heart exploded, his chest was empty. He wanted to run but he was frozen. He wanted to fight but he couldn't move. He wanted to scream but he had no voice. He wanted to cry but he couldn't find the strength. He was numb. The only kind of numb one felt when they lost someone.

He couldn't breathe, was he breathing? He couldn't move, where was his body? The world melting away until it was just Blue and Hothead. Just Leo and Raph.

No, it wasn't Raph anymore, it was just his body. Just a body. A broken body that once belonged to his best friend.

"R... Raph..." Leo's haggard voice felt foreign in his ears. He couldn't take his eyes away from the crumpled form of his best friend. They had made a promise that they would, no matter what, stick together and look out for each other. They would be together even when they came home from war. They would always have each other's back but now... Now Raph... He was. He was...

The hands that were holding Leo suddenly let go, Leo fell to his knees unable to hold himself up any longer. He'd seen people die before but this… this was Raph, Raphie, Hothead. This was his best friend, his _brother_.

Leo couldn't take his eyes off of Raph's body. His mind didn't even register the fact that there was no blood pooling around the body. All he could see was Raph's crumpled form.

Then the world stopped as soft moan came from Raphael's body. His finger twitched, then his leg moved. Two words registered through Leonardo's numb mind.

_Not. Dead. _

Leo never had the chance to scream Raph's name. The butt of a rifle was brought down across the back of his head plunging his world into darkness.

* * *

**First attempt at an AU! Thanks for reading :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_"When the first one dies, you die too. On the inside you die with every one of your soldiers."_

When you're a kid war is just a game. Fingers are guns. Rocks are grenades. Dirt piles are embankments and makeshift trenches. The front lines are your back yard. When you get shot you do down with theatrics yelling that _you're hit! You're hit!_ Then falling to the grass your father just mowed with flailing limbs. You thrash around on the manicured lawn until you've decide that you've bled out and stop. You stay still until you've decided you've been 'dead' long enough. After that point you jump to your feet laughing while you're friends are laughing. You continue on killing each other until your mother call you inside for dinner. It's all a game and it's all fun.

But war, it's not a game.

Something crunched near Leonardo's head pulling him from the blackness of unconsciousness. He fought tooth and nail to stay inside of it. To keep the black nothingness wrapped around him. He was confused, angry, and he knew if he left this nothingness that surrounded him it would all get worse. He heard another crunch then a groan, it sounded nearer, too near. Leo felt scared. Whatever that noise was it was too close and he still had his eyes shut. Steeling himself he forced his eyes open. He needed to be brave. But, nothing happened. He tried to open his eyes but they were stuck, too heavy. Something hard and rough was under his cheek and the side of his face. It was painful. He hurt. Everything hurt. His eyes wouldn't open.

Another groan. Leo was almost sure it had come from his mouth.

"Shh... -nardo," Someone whispered softly near his aching head. "It's okay... Okay, Leo. You're... be fine... fine." The voice was getting farther and farther away, like it was backing down a dark tunnel.

Softly, something touched his head. Leonardo still couldn't get his eyes to open. They were glued shut. Absently Leo thought of a toddler with Gorilla Glue smearing it across the rims of his eyes and pinching them shut until they dried. There was a muffled sound above him. Someone was speaking.

Leo felt himself whimper as the speaking voice gingerly moved his head so his cheek came off of the hard, rough surface. Leo felt himself cry out as a sensitive part of his head was touched maybe purposely, maybe accidentally. Fire licked down his neck, his heartbeat drummed in his head. Slowly he felt himself being placed back down on something soft, warm.

"Get some sleep," the voice commanded. It sounded familiar, comforting. But Leonardo couldn't call a face to it. His mind was too muggy, too pain filled. His head beat too loudly to concentrate. Using one last pull of energy and hope, Leo forced his eye lids to unstick. As soon as his eyes opened he was assaulted by light. His eyes felt like they were being burned through. He tried to jerk his head to the side and pull his arms up to cover his face but they refused to do his bidding. When he moved his neck more pain flared from his head. Tears brimmed his eyes and ran down as agony shot down his body.

"Leo. Blue! It's okay. It's okay! Shhh... Shhh, you're okay. You're okay." A hand came down over his eyes and another one was placed on his chest rubbing soothing circles. "Shh, Leo."

Darkness grabbed at Leo as his head fell to the side and he passed out.

* * *

This time when Leonardo came to he didn't feel as heavy, his eyelids weren't glued shut. Tentatively, Leo opened his eyes and blinked three times. There was something tall and brown an inch from his face. The closeness of whatever it was scared the teenager into jerking back.

Pain. His head drummed. Leonardo brought dirty hands up to his head trying to keep his brain from leaking out his ears.

"Morning Sleeping Beauty," came a rough voice. The voice startled Leo but he was smart enough this time not to jerk around. Instead he closed his eyes against the orange light that blanketed around him and then slowly, deliberately twisted and hoisted himself up until he was in a sitting position. The pounding in his head settled some when he let himself fall gently against the hard wall. When he stopped moving, Leonardo finally opens his eyes. It took a few moments for them to adjust but when they did Leo gasped, tears leaked from his eyes. Without thinking he jutted forward trying to get closer, needing to touch, to prove that he was really there. That he was real and not some ghost.

"R-Ra-" was all he got out before whatever was under him supporting his weight - his legs, his knees, his arms - give out and he fell to the ground, face first and eating dirt.

The figure that sat on the other side of the small hut they were in jumped to his feet, "Maybe you should go back to sleep."

Leo looked up as Raphael knelt down beside him and grabbed his waist. The red haired boy pulled gently until Leo was sitting up again then even more gently set him back against the side of the rough wall. Bits on rock dug into his back. Raph looked down into Leo's eyes as he moved his head up so he could get a better look at the boys' pupils.

Leo coughed wetly looking up at Raph, tears ran unashamed down his face. "R-Raph, I-I thought you were dead… Am... am I dead?" He had to be dead. He'd seen them shoot Raph in the head. He'd seen the man brandish his rifle and point it at Raph… didn't he? Didn't Raph get shot..?

Raphael took a long breath before sitting down next to his best friend. He bit his lip thinking about when he'd woken up seething Leo's body twisted and tangled at awkward angles at the other side of the hut. He'd panicked, jumped over to his friend already convinced that he was dead. There was so much blood around his head, too much...

But then he'd moved. He groaned. He was still alive.

"I ain't dead Leo, an' neither are you."

Leonardo took a deep breath mentally pulling himself together. He was a soldier, he needed to keep his head on straight. Leo blinked four times before the world around him came into better focus. Sitting up had helped; it cleared some of the cobwebs from his head. Looking around, Leo took in their surroundings. They both sat in a small room. It looked to be made out of the same mud and rock consistency that the locals made their small shanty-huts out of. There was one window near the top of the rocky brown wall that was big enough to light up the entire space yet too small to fit through.

_Damn_, Leo cursed. The hut was a circle in shape with only one door that was on the opposite side of the useless window. The door looked solid. Solid and locked.

He started, "Is the door-"

"Locked."

"Damn."

Raph sighed heavily. "The Charlie's came in a few hours ago. They just looked at us and talked to each other in Spanish, I couldn't understand them. Then they left."

"Does this means we're... What? Prisoners?"

"Guess so."

"Damn," Leo repeated again, there was nothing else to say. No other words to express.

They were silent for a few minutes, both thinking over the events that landed them here. Faintly, Leo thought he could still hear the screams of his friends. The way their guns peppered against the ground around his tent. He could still feel the fire, it licked and burned and torched every important file and piece of paper he was issued.

Dead. All dead. Dead or scattered or captured.

"_What happened to never leaving a fallen comrade?"_

"_What happened to not being a stupid idiot?"_

Sweat dripped down Leo's forehead mixing into the dried blood that had already painted his face from being hit by the butt of the Charlie's rifle. Not for the first time Leonardo felt choked by the heat. He pulled at the collar of his army camo jacket. He pulled once then twice trying to get stagnate air to rush into his clothes to help cool down his already overheated body. He pulled again on his collar then stopped when he heard nothing. There was no jungle coming from his chest. Quickly, almost frantically, he grabbed for the tags that were supposed to be hanging around his neck. When he only felt sweat slicked skin his heart sank. He had no tags. No identifying number or name. Nothing that showed his identification number or his religious preference of Protestant Non Denomination.

"They took my Dog Tags," he tells Raph letting his head fall against the side of the hut. His hand, now sweaty, also falls dejectedly to his side.

Raph nods slowly gnawing on the side of his cheek, "Mine too."

"Nothing to I.D us."

"Nope."

Again they are quiet. Something outside of the hut stirs, voices seep through as muffled and foreign. Leo doesn't hear anything he recognizes. He's fluent in Spanish – he had to be to become a Communications Specialist – but he doesn't hear anything that makes any sense. Suddenly a voice close to their door laughed. It was deep and throaty and Leo jumped slightly. Someone ran in front of the door. The sound became softer and lighter as the person running passed and got further away.

"I think we're in the middle of a village," said Raph looking down at his fingernails. His too-bright red hair stuck to his forehead.

Leo looked at his best friend, "Where are we?"

"We're in a hut," he answered eyeing Leo stupidly.

"Why are we in a hut? I always thought that POW's were caged underground," Leo huffed out a humorless laugh. "In like, dank cells with one light and dripping ceilings or something. And some guy threatening us with guns and needles and demanding to know all our secrets."

"Yeah well, looks like we just get stuck in a hut." He was quiet again, watching the door. "Heh," Raph says suddenly, then grumbles, "stuck in a hut... That rhymes."

Leo jerked his head over to look at Raph. A ghost of a smile was stretched thinly against his lips. Raph didn't look over at Leo, he stared forward and let his thin lips mold into a slightly bigger smile.

"Shut up, Hothead," Leo chuckled shaking his head slowly.

"Whatever you say Blue."

They were both silent after that, both listening to the sounds of outside. There were more voices muffled by the thick door separating them. Younger, lighter voices yelled playfully back and forth to one another. Their sounds wafted through the small open window.

"Pasa la pelota! Ven a pasar! ¡Pásalo!"

"You speak Spanish, right?" asked Raph after listening to the children's voices for a while. Leo nodded, staring at the far wall listening to the children and imagining what they looked like by the way they spoke. He ran his tongue over his lips, he was thirsty. A bead of sweat dripped onto his tongue. It tasted dirty and salty.

"Vamos, su mi turno para jugar con la pelota! Se acabó para siempre ya!"

"Come on, it's my turn to play with the ball… You've had it forever already." Leo translated to Raph. He slimed slightly at the wine in the boys' voice. He sounded just like Mikey...

There was a commotion, the sound of rustling and shoving. Something hit the dirt then another something. More sounds of scuffling and then there was a roar of children yelling and egging on. One voice was distinctly older sounding than the others. It yelled over the other children forcefully. But it sounded more brotherly commanding than fatherly.

"Vale, vale. Eso es suficiente Hector. Basta usted loco!"

Raph looked to Leo expectedly.

Leo let the words translate in his head then roll off his tongue without really thinking, just letting his mind work. "He's just telling them to break it up."

Leonardo's heart sank as he listened to the older boy speak again to the others. He was reminded of himself whenever Don or Mikey started getting into a fight over something stupid and he had to step in and break it up.

"Hey Blue?"

Leo looked over to Raph, "Yeah Raphie?"

"Why did your dad always sign _Splinter_ at the end of his letters to you?"

Leo looked at him, dumbstruck, "How did you-"

You left an email open a while ago on you're iPad an I saw it." He admitted almost guiltily. "Sorry, I was board. It was when you went out for a walk through with Captain Bennison ."

Leo nodded remembering going out on a jungle mission with Captain Bennison and the rest of his team a few weeks ago. They needed a communications specialist to relay messages back to command while they scouted a possible Charlie outpost. Stockman had been among them complaining per usual about the heat and how he should have become a scientist instead of a soldier. At that time Leonardo had wished the man had become a scientist as well just to save him the headache of having to listen to him bitch and moan about the heat and the weight of their packs and LAW rifles.

Leo licked his dry lips with his even drier tongue. He'd never really told anyone about his father's nickname, no one had really ever asked actually. But, Leo figured, there was really nothing else left to do in this small, hot hut other than talk.

"It's just an old nickname of his. Kind of a long story."

Raph raised an eyebrow at him. "We got plenty of time."

Leo shuttered then nodded his head slowly. "His got the nickname in Vietnam. He was drafted but he said that he would've joined anyway even if he didn't get chosen. He was a paratrooper. Anyway, so him and about ten others were ordered to jump down into this hill in Khe Sanh. The Marines there were having trouble keeping the hill and they asked for backup."

"Those Devil Dogs needed backup? No way," Raph chuckled remembering the Marines who had come through their camp a few months ago all chiseled and growling with thick arms and tattoos.

"Yeah," Leo smiled slightly. "So my dad and his team jumped near the hill and we about there when Viets started shooting at 'em from the ground. They killed his buddy Yoshi right away. Dad said a bullet went right through his forehead... Yoshi was dad's best friend, he used to tell us stories about him all the time... Anyway, they shot through his parashoot and he free fell the rest of the way to the ground. He hit a tree going fifty miles an hour and it snapped his leg in half. Almost tore his arm off too. A big splinter from the tree went right throw his hand. When the Marines finally found him he had taken up position in a ditch at the bottom of the hill with the three others who had survived in a ditch at the bottom of the hill. He had set his leg using wood from the tree he'd demolished."

"So that's how he got his name?"

"Yeah." Leo coughed, his head swam. It was so hot. "He had to keep that splinter of wood in his hand for three days while they waited to be rescued. He knew if he had taken it out he would've bled to death."

Raph rearranged and slid until he was laying down, his bright red head close to Leo's thigh. "Sounds like a badass."

Leo didn't say anything. He couldn't. He felt ashamed talking about his father. He knew, deep inside that if his father had been here he could've found a way to stop the men from capturing them. He would have done something better, thought quicker, fought harder, not have been so afraid. Splinter would have been smarter and saved his men. Leo buried his face in his hands. The hut was so stuffy with stale air that it was hard to think. His head hurt. His legs felt like jelly still from running - stumbling - through the jungle with Raph. He tried to take a deep breath to calm himself but the air was too dense, he couldn't breathe. He was so thirsty. He was so tired. His head hurt. He tried again to take another breath but his throat closed up. The air was stolen from his lungs. The walls of the small hut felt so close, too close. He felt his face, it was awash with sweat. His jacket was constricting but he knew he needed to keep it on. It had his last name – Hamato – stitched on the front. He didn't have his dog tags, no means of identification. If they killed him his body would just be buried in some mass grave, if they even bothered to bury him. Maybe he'd be burned or just thrown in the jungle somewhere.

"Leo?"

Who would remember him? His family would. No, they would hate him. They already did hate him. Donatello refuse to talk to him, he wouldn't answer his emails or letters or even Skype him back. Mikey barely spoke to him and when he did he would just beg Leo to come home or ask him why he'd signed up in the first place.

"Leo?"

April would miss him, he knew that. But she would get on well without him. She would find some other guy who didn't decide to go to war. She would find someone else to open doors for her and take her to the movies or listened to her while she read the newspaper aloud. Some other man who wasn't too stupid to think he could play hero in some third world country would kiss her cheek and whisper sweet nothings in her ear –

"Dude! Leo!" A voice yelled close to his face. Leonardo snapped his eyes open and jerked away from the face that was inches from his nose. The bands around his chest that constructed his breathing were finally cut away letting him take a full fledged breath of air. He gulped in the stale oxygen and scooted away from Raph's worried face.

"I'm fine," he said. "I'm fine."

"Like hell you are."

* * *

"If you could go back in time, where and when would you go?" Leo questioned. The sun was just about to set. Their small hut was alight with oranges and yellows. The camp or town or wherever they were was eerily silent save for the creatures that lurked in the jungle around them. It had been two days since they'd woken up in this small hut. The door had only opened once to reveal an old man with two buckets. One filled with water and the other empty. The empty one had a cloth over it.

"What's the empty one for?" Raph had asked.

Leo gave him a suffering glare. "What do you think?"

"Oh," Raph's eyes had gone wide.

"Are we playing games now?" Raph asked with a slight smile on his cracked lips. The water had been so nice even if it was dirty. But, it hadn't lasted long. Both boys chugged their share down without much thought then stared at each other for an inordinate amount of time thinking and cursing themselves for downing all of their water so quickly.

"It's either that or stare at eachother some more and I have to say, your face is getting uglier by the second."

"It's a good thing yer my best friend, Leo. 'Else I'd have ta pop you in the mouth fer callin' me ugly. And besides, yer one to talk. That ain't no shiner on the side of your face. It looks pretty awful. I think yer gonna have a few scars."

Leo shrugged, "Chicks dig scars, man."

"Does April?" Raph looked up from their game of tic-tac-toe they were playing in the dirt when Leo didn't answer back right away. Leo was biting his bottom lip while looking away from his friend. They were both quiet for a while as Leo turned back to their game.

After two more games that both ended in a draw, Raph finally asked, "When would you go back to?"

Leo didn't hesitate, "I'd go back to just before the Charlies attacked. When we were sitting in the Comm. tent."

"Why?"

"Cause everyone was still alive."

"Oh."

"And we only had seven days left." Raph nodded. Leo turned his head away to cough. This coughs were getting worse, they racked his chest making it hard to breath. They sounded wet and rattled deep in his chest. When he thought he was done hacking he turned back to Raph. It was less than a minute later when another round hit. He doubled over grabbing for the collar of his shirt to pull it away from his throat. He hacked and hacked, his throat felt like it was bleeding. Something vile crept up his throat, stinging it and making his eyes leak with tears. He jerked away from Raph and flung himself as far away from his friend as he could then promptly threw up everything that was in his stomach. The bile burned all the way up. He couldn't breathe. After he was done throwing up he noticed Raph sitting on his knees next to him, whispering close to his head and genty patting his back.

"It's okay… it's okay."

Leo sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth with the bottom of his shirt. Damn, he wished he had some water.

"Maybe my brothers were right." He croaked, Raph took his hand away. "Maybe we shouldn't be here. Maybe I shouldn't have joined." His voice cracked.

Raph took a deep breath before helping move Leo over to the other side of the hut slowly.

"No, they were wrong." He said looking Leo straight in the eye. Leo felt nauseous. "We're 'ere because if we weren't then people would keep getting hurt. Dying. We're here to protect people."

"We aren't doing a lot of protecting in here Raph. Mooch and Stockman and Holloway sure as hell aren't protecting a lot of people," Leo scowled.

Just then the door was flung open. Raph scrambled to his feel and steeled himself for whatever was about happen, whoever was about to come through. Leo tried to get up but his arms were too shaky, his body felt too weak from forcing everything out through his mouth a few minutes ago. He set a deep scowl on his face.

A man came through. He was young looking, no older than twenty-five by the looks out it. In his right hand he held an automatic rifle. Leo cursed inwardly, the rifle was one of theirs. In the man's other hand was a bucket of water. It sloshed around inside the metal tin. Leo licked his lips involuntary and was reminded of how incredibly thirsty he was once again. His tongue felt like sandpaper and his mouth tasted like something had crawled up inside of it and died.

The man smirked at the two soldiers. "Thirsty?" He taunted in perfect English. Raph looked sideways down at Leo who stared holes into the man. They wouldn't show weakness. They were still soldiers.

The man just stared right back at them. They stayed like that, all three just looking at each other for the longest time. Finally, Raph had had enough. "You know, if you stare long enough I do a trick." He held up his middle finger, "Oh! There it is."

Leo laughed thinly, the man smiled darkly, unamused. Raph put his hand down. The man dropped the bucket to the ground spilling and soaking the dirt. Leo could have cried as he saw the dirt become moist with the water they were supposed to drink.

"Opps." The man laughed then about-faced and left slamming and locking the door behind him.

Leo let his head fall against the wall, defeated. Raph sat next to him mirroring his posture. "How long do you think they'll keep us before they kill us?"

"I don't know, Raphie."

* * *

**Sorry for the long wait and sorry that nothing really happened in this chapter. Writers block was hitting me hard. In truth I wasn't planning on this being a chapter story - in the original draft Raph had died in the first chap and that was the end... but then I just couldn't kill him and this became a chapter fic. There should be one or two more chapters :) **

**Have a good day**


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